How has your relationships with friends changed? Do you see yourself dating new people and happy? I know it’s difficult to imagine but let’s imagine this new life for you.ĭon’t ask yourself how things change immediately, but rather what does your life look like a month or three months from now? What does life look like after dating this woman? Can You Visualize Yourself Single And Happier Than You Are Now? I’ve seen many a man go through the same issues you’re currently hung up on.Īnd spoiler: When you turn to the internet looking for advice on whether or not to ditch your girlfriend, that’s a good sign you should break up with her. have helped close to 1,000 men through this very problem. If your buddy hasn’t had a girlfriend for years, chances are he’s not the guru he thinks he is. When shopping around for the best romantic window, don’t settle on words of advice from people that don’t have what you want. It doesn’t matter how money they think you are (or they are) what matters is that they give quality advice. They huddle around their friends as their buddies beat the drum and vomit horrible advice into their ears. Should I Break Up With My Girlfriend? Get Advice From Those Who Have What You Wantįar too often men only take advice from their tribe. Broaching these difficult questions will help you determine whether the relationship has the strength to last. Just as you’re allowed to end things with that person should they change in a way that isn’t to your liking.Īsk yourself if you could imagine raising a child with this person? Ask if they would insist on raising their child with views that don’t square with yours.
Social media paired with vitriolic politics and the increasing importance of various issues, has created the perfect polarization storm.ĭo you still want to date someone whose moral and/or political views have changed so drastically over the past few years?Īs Pew Research shows, dating someone from the other end of the political spectrum is a major holdup. We’ve seen the country become more polarized than ever over the last 5 years or so. It’s possible that you’ve been together so long that you and your partner have changed over the years.Īt first you two had values that aligned - now that’s not so much the case. How long have you and your current partner been together? If the negative emotions outweigh the positive ones (or even if you’re not relatively happy 90% of the time) you probably have your answer to if you should break up with your girlfriend. How often do you feel happy, sad, excited, annoyed, content, etc. Take out a paper and pen and create a pie chart right now. If I were to ask you to break your relationship down into a pie chart and divvy up how often you feel certain emotions around her, what would it look like? If the relationship has negatively impacted other areas of your life it might be time to break up with your girlfriend.Īlso ask yourself if this is her fault, yours, or a problem you have with every relationship you’re in. Perhaps your relationship with her is fine, but how has it changed other aspects of your life? How has your career, mental health, relationship with friends changed since dating this woman? Has your life improved or gotten worse since you started dating your new girlfriend? Is Your Life Worse Since You Started Dating Her? There’s no reason to settle when you know you can date amazing women. You date prolifically in order to quickly find someone you’re compatible with.īut you also do it to prove to yourself that there are women out there worth spending time with. You have a date lined up for Wednesday with Becca, Thursday with Katie, and Saturday with Victoria. They’re complacent with the routine, enjoy sleeping next to a warm body, and aren’t brave enough to venture out into the world as a single person.Īpart from what I just listed, you’re suffering from the sunk-cost fallacy. They stay with the person they’ve been dating because it’s easy. I can’t tell you how many students and friends have told me that they stay in a relationship longer than they should because they’re comfortable or afraid of the unknown.
Are You Staying With Her Because It’s Easy? If all your friends know about your girlfriend is what you tell them, listening to their advice could be akin to listening to an echo chamber. However, if it becomes a habit (one ideally your friends can help identify) it might be time to reevaluate the relationship. Of course, everyone does once in a while. It’s fair to say that happy guys don’t say bad things about their girlfriends behind their backs.
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